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Cheese Couplets*

If G. K. Chesterton was right, literature is in a sad state. Chesterton is supposed† to have said, “The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.” Hard to believe, but I think it may be true. Sure, there may be a verse or two on cheese hidden away somewhere in a Shel Silverstein book, but I’m afraid this beautiful gift has been almost entirely, inexplicably, overlooked by the poets. I aim to rectify that.

Colby is fine, but what I like better
Is the lovely bouquet of an extra-sharp cheddar.

For a good, tasty snack that will never miss,
Try a nice dunkel bier and a platter of Swiss.

My lips smack
When I eat Pepper Jack.

Grab a sheep and pull and squeeze—
Have yourself some Roquefort cheese.

Though Muenster cheese may sound quite German,
It’s American, like Munster (Herman).

Primost looks like peanut butter, but it’s not—
It’s from the udder.

Feta is a royal treat,
Although it smells a lot like feet.

When cheese smells bad, that means it’s good—
I’d say that of my verses, if I could.

And here’s a submission from the psalmist, David Regier:

Give me your tired, your poor, your curdled masses
Longing to be Brie.


* Originally posted May 9, 2007.

† I’ve never read Chesterton, and I’m too lazy to verify the quotation.

Posted 2019·03·29 by David Kjos
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Posted in: Reruns

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