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Radio Rant*


We will return with our regularly scheduled edification after this brief rant:

I recently had a conversation that went something like this:

Local insipid, soulless, Christian radio station: Give your praise to the Lord / Come on everybody / stand up and sing one more / hallelujah / Give your praise to the Lord / I could never tell ya [sic] / just how much good that it’s / gonna [sic] do ya [sic] . . .

Me: Man, that is one annoying, stupid song.

Annoying person singing along: What’s wrong with this song?

Me: Where shall I start? OK, first, the melody, if you can call it that. It sounds like it was written by an asthmatic who can only sing two measures before stopping to gasp for air. But that’s not the worst of it. The words are horrible.

APSA: So, you’re against praising the Lord, now?

Me: Not at all, but if you’re praising the Lord because of how much good it’s going to do you, you’re not really praising the Lord. You’re practicing self-help therapy.

image

APSA: You’re so picky.

Me: [Sigh . . .]

I can’t stand it. Discernment is out. Ignorant enthusiasm is in. According to a scientific study I am about to make up, 92.7% of American Evangelicals don’t know Paul of Tarsus from Paul McCartney. They don’t know Simon Barjonah from Paul Simon. They think John Bunyan needed a podiatrist, and that Polycarp & Spurgeon are fish.

If Christian radio is a fair representation of Evangelicalism at large—and, according to the study cited above, it is—then Evangelicalism is a dead movement, utterly bankrupt theologically and intellectually brain-dead. If there was a convention for truly artistically gifted CCM performers, all the participants could ride in one car. If all the Christian broadcasters who are able to distinguish John MacArthur from Joyce Meyer had a party, they couldn’t get up a Bridge game. If all the Christian publishers who know the difference between John Owen and John Eldredge went to the gym, they couldn’t field a basketball team.† If . . .

[Sigh . . .]

* Originally posted September 7, 2007

† I suppose “field” is the wrong word here. If all the bloggers who know anything about sports had a party, I wouldn’t be invited.



Posted 2019·04·23 by David Kjos
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Posted in: Reruns

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